Believing is Seeing: Dawn of a New Day

I begin every morning with a meditation after I open the shades and let the light of a new day enter my room.

Yesterday's sunrise was spectacular and inspired a poem:


Dawn of a New Day from the soon to be released Hope: A Collection of Essays and Poems From the Pandemic of 2020:

Dawn of a new day
radiant morning light
a kiss to awaken

Daybreak whisks away yesterday’s cobwebs of worry
greeting new day with a heart full of gratitude
possibilities await on the horizon

How will you paint the Masterpiece of today
each moment an opportunity to reveal and revel

Bask in the Love of the Divine
Rejoice in the dawn of a new day!

I reflected on the wonder and awe of creation in the world and in my corner of the Universe.

By all appearances and predictions from the medical community, I 'should' have been sitting in a wheelchair right now with all kinds of adaptive equipment to support a neuromuscular system deemed headed on a rapid decline. It was called Post Polio Syndrome and was the result of the late effects of having contracted paralytic polio at the age of 5. While paralytic polio is a devastating virus that impacts the spinal cord, brain and connections between nerves and muscles, it can be healed (as can any disease) given the right environment. Unfortunately, the environment I lived in growing up was rife with violence and anything but conducive to healing and recovery.

At the age of 53 I had an incredible opportunity to heal my life with the crisis of that diagnosis.

I got still, asked for Divine Guidance and harnessed the power of my imagination through writing poetry. I saw and felt a future very different from the one that the Western Medical model predicted for me. I healed my past with poems of gratitude and forgiveness.
of
In my meditations, I visualized the Divine as my Master Electrician rewiring my body. I worked my body in new ways under the guidance of a physical therapist who believed in the body's innate capacity to heal and then with a personal trainer who subscribed to Henry Ford's mantra of whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right.

Despite all appearances, I believed in my mind's eye that I could and would run the 2009 Boston Marathon:


Before February of 2008, I had never run a day in my life!

In December of 2014, my left knee blew out. I briefly returned to Western Medicine to see what needed to be healed. As expected, the prognosis was grim but I refused to be grim.

After an epic fail with a physical therapist, the Universe led me to an amazing chiropractor. He gave me a new strength training program, chiropractic treatments, KT tape and new mind/body healing resources to get me back on the roads and continue my forward momentum in my healing journey.

I went on to run Half Marathons in Bermuda in 2016, 2017 and 2018!

Every dawn is a new day; an opportunity to see ourselves and the world the way we want things to be. It is so easy to get pulled in the undertow of catastrophic news and the rancor in the political landscape. I start my day with imagining what headlines I would like to read and transform raging fires, devastating hurricanes and the raging fear of a pandemic into a world where Mother Nature is in balance, where people focus on their health and well being and where inevitable storms that are a part of life are no longer catastrophic in nature.

I know that together we can create a new world order; that these recent months of navigating our way through turbulent times will lead us to a better place.

You may wonder how can she hold onto hope and optimism when, by all appearances, everything is falling apart...My answer to that question is that believing is seeing!

To learn more about my inspiring journey and explore healing resources, be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books are available on Amazon

From my heart to yours
to your health and well being
Mary

Hope: A Collection of Poems and Essays From the Pandemic of 2020

My original title for my next book was "Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life Volume 2."

During a meditation, I was inspired to change the title and include blog posts I have written since February before the world became locked in the grip of a pandemic.

My worlds as a writer, runner, poet and eternal optimist collide in my latest book which includes original poetry written after March 15th and reflections during an unprecedented time in our history.

I am excited to share with you the working draft of the Introduction:

Speaking at the Hyannis Marathon Pre-Race Pasta Dinner in February of 2020 and sharing my journey at the Expo was a highlight of my most unlikely running career. I reunited with friends I had met since I discovered the sport of running in February of 2008. Hugs and selfies were the order of the day. I made new friends at the Expo and after my talk at the Pre-Race Pasta Dinner where I shared the podium with Bill Rodgers. We were all looking forward to a reunion in April in Boston for the Boston Marathon and for a year of exhilarating events.

We were excited to be hosting the water stop for our beloved running club, L Street on March 8th. We ignored any of the quiet warnings about COVID-19 and hugged sweaty runners, poured water and Gatorade into cups for runners to drink and congratulated runners on getting through one of their last long runs before taper time for the Boston Marathon.

On March 12th, I walked into my pregnant chiropractor’s office.

The airwaves and social media news feeds were beginning to fill with fear and panic. I had a sense in my gut that something was terribly wrong with the messages and the methods that surrounded COVID-19.

“I don’t think they have any plan for this,” I told Dr. Lizzie.

“I’m not worried about getting the virus,” Dr. Lizzie said. “I’m worried about what’s going to happen to my business.”

Always the commensurate professional, Dr. Lizzie gave me an outstanding treatment of chiropractic care. We hugged at the end of the treatment.

“As long as things are open, I will be here,” she said.

The first email she sent outlined the precautions she would take while keeping her practice open. Two days later she said that she would have to follow the State and City guidelines and temporarily close her practice. As numbers of cases spiked, she made the decision to close her practice until January 2021 giving herself an extended maternity leave.

I witnessed my friends who are small business owners shutter their shops. Since we were not financially affected by the shut down, we supported them as much as we could. We ordered take out from our favorite restaurants, shopped on line and bought gift certificates to our favorite stores to use once restrictions were lifted.

In March of 2020, there was an epidemic of fear and a time of chaos related to the COVID-19 virus. It inspired me to open my heart and soul to the gift of poetry and writing I discovered shortly after the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome.

Victor Frankl said that “The last of the human freedoms: to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. And there were always choices to make. Every day, every hour, offered the opportunity to make a decision, a decision which determined whether you would or would not submit to those powers which threatened to rob you of your very self, your inner freedom; which determined whether or not you become the plaything to circumstance, renouncing freedom and dignity...”

I returned to harnessing the power of my pen, my divining rod for healing and am delighted to share with you this new collection of poetry and reflections of life during an unprecedented time of a pandemic, economic upheaval, a call to eliminate racial injustice and, in the United States, an election of epic historical proportions.

I discovered the gift of poetry in my soul in February of 2007 shortly after the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December of 2006. I was told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair and to expect an accelerated aging progress as a result of the polio virus I contracted when I was 5 years old in one of the last polio epidemics in the United States. Despite having had 5 vaccines, I still contracted the virus. But having had polio and then being diagnosed with Post-Polio Syndrome were two of the greatest gifts in my life for which I am deeply grateful. I discovered the gift of poetry in my soul AND was led to the sport of running.

I call my pen my divining rod for healing as poems poured forth from my soul inspiring me to let go of the pain of the past through gratitude, love and forgiveness and imagine a beautiful future for myself; one in which my body was running – yes running – free and seeing myself as healthy, happy, whole and healed!

Running helped me to transform from a survivor of paralytic polio and severe childhood trauma to a marathoner discovering strength, redemption, a most remarkable village of friends and most importantly, the truth of who I am.

While out on a morning run in March of 2020, I witnessed the stirring of new life with the beginning of Spring in New England. I felt a stirring in my soul. Despite the chaos and fear, I felt a sense of hope and possibility. A poem poked its way through me and I knew it was time to write another book. These poems and reflections are in chronological order of when they were written from March 15th through (date to be determined).

Although races and events were either postponed and eventually cancelled, or went to a virtual race format, running three times a week helped me to navigate the turbulent times. Those runs inspired poems and reflections. Those runs helped me to stay focused, grounded and optimistic always finding something to be grateful for and appreciate in the world around me.

As fear and anger filled the airwaves and social media streams, it was a time for deep breaths, connecting to the Divine, the Source of all, connecting to nature and to each other soul to soul, heart to heart without politics and divisiveness but with tenderness, love, kindness and compassion. Often times it takes a crisis to awaken us to healing, hope and possibilities. My hope is that this collection of poems and essays serve as a reminder that whatever the challenge, however dark and hopeless things may seem, there is always faith, hope and optimism to guide us through.



I feel wonderful when I am immersed in the creative process inspired by messages from Spirit. I am writing "Hope" in real time and will know when the arc of the story will be complete.

There have been several times throughout my life when life came to a screeching halt. I am filled with healing, hope and possibility that as individuals, as a community, as a country and a world we can move forward and heal.

To be inspired by my journey from having been told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books are available on Amazon.

From my heart to yours
In health, hope and wellness
Mary

The only time you should look back...Wollaston Beach Then and Now!

I clearly remember the day early in the summer of 2007 when I gingerly stepped out of our car to walk a little bit on the sidewalk adjacent to Wollaston Beach. Although I had been through intensive outpatient rehab at Spaulding Rehab following the diagnosis of Post Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease in December of 2006, I was still deconditioned from the effects of childhood paralytic polio and trauma. I wore a toe up leg brace:


and was walking without a cane. I knew that the prediction the doctors made of me spending the rest of my life in a wheelchair would not come to be but I had a long road ahead of me to regain strength and a vibrant quality of life.

We did many training runs on the road to the 2009 Boston Marathon at Wollaston Beach.

Since the pandemic, we had not been to the beach this summer. We desperately needed a change of scenery for our run, especially since we had the relief of Tom testing negative for the virus as mandated by BC.

I may have gotten emotional when I saw the sand and the expansiveness of the ocean, sun and sky and experienced these beauty moments on our run:



I recalled with Tom and Ruth Anne that first day we came to Wollaston Beach and the transformation I experienced through the sport of running; how we have all been transformed by running.

The 4 mile run was a bit challenging with people riding bikes, roller blading, and maintaining social distancing on the sometimes narrow sidewalk, but the views and breathing in sea air was well worth the trade offs.

Four miles in the books as I count down the miles my goal of 50+ miles for the month of August. In the summer of 2007, could I have ever imagined that 13 years later I would have run the 2009 Boston Marathon, with many races leading up to Boston; 3 Bermuda Half Marathons in 2016, 2017 and 2018 and been part of a panel for the Virtual Boston Marathon Expo in September? I imagined myself healthy, whole and free through my poetry and visualization but had no idea where the road would lead from those shaky steps to today.

I often say "Don't look back you're not going that way." The only time you should look back is to see how far you've come!

I am in awe and deeply grateful to see the miles I have traveled on the road and in my life during these past 13 years!

To learn more about my inspiring journey, please visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books are available on Amazon

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
Mary

On Running, Resilience and Redemption

My physical therapist read Dr. Seuss to me before every painful physical therapy session to coax my muscles and nerves back to health after contracting paralytic polio at age 5. She would have me recite the book I chose (usually The Cat in the Hat) back to her in tandem with her during the treatment. His wisdom lives on in my heart and soul.

In the days leading up to running the Virtual Billy Mills 10K/5K on Saturday and during Saturday's run, I reflected on Billy Mills' journey and how his winning Gold in Tokyo in 1964 helped to heal his broken soul.

I came to the sport of running late in life. I was 53 years old when the words, "And I want to run the 2009 Boston Marathon for Spaulding Rehab" gushed forth from my soul without a thought. I had been working with a personal trainer for six months to see if I could get a little stronger and build on the outpatient therapy program I received from Spaulding after the diagnosis of Post Polio Syndrome in December of 2006. I had never run a day in my life but as Billy Mills states quoting one of his college textbooks, "The subconscious mind can't distinguish between imagination and reality."

Shortly after the diagnosis in February of 2007, after getting still and asking for Divine Guidance, the poem, 'Running the Race' flowed out of me followed by many poems in which I was healthy, whole and free running and dancing in the rain without the toe up leg brace I was prescribed.



The last stanza reads:
Using wheelchair to travel, set limits on what I could do,
Resulted in joy to realize I could live life anew.
Celebrated my body- creaks, groans and need for a brace
While in my mind I focused on winning a 10K race.
Sought out paths for healing and my spirit flew free
For the first time in life, I could truly be me.
The chains are gone and possibilities abound
I'm a tree with my roots planted firmly in ground.
I'm now off the sidelines, no need to sit and whine
So much gratitude fills my heart and love and beauty shine.
After all these years I can join the loving human race
I exceed all expectations and now I set the pace.

I started out running 30 seconds and walking for 4 and a half minutes. Little by little 30 seconds turned into 30 minutes and 30 minutes into miles...a 5K to a 10K to a half marathon to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon!


On the road to the Boston Marathon I fell in love with the sport of running. I loved how I went from being jeered by my peers as a survivor of paralytic polio who struggled to keep up with my classmates while lugging a full metal leg brace to being celebrated by the running community.

I loved my transformation from a survivor of paralytic polio and severe trauma that culminated with my father's death by suicide on August 1st, 1971 to a woman of strength, resilience, courage, faith, grace, beauty feeling empowered rather than feeling like a victim.



What a "coincidence" that Billy Mills Virtual race happened on the 49th anniversary of my father's suicide. The days leading up to the anniversary are often difficult for me since he disappeared 5 days before his death and two days before his death he left a suicide note in our car in the garage. This year had been particularly challenging for me with the pandemic without the usual distractions and joys that summertime brings that help to temper the traumatic memories.

But when I woke up on Saturday morning, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief and release unlike I experienced in previous years. Billy Mills' story deepened my own appreciation for how running has helped me to heal my life; how running the 2009 Boston Marathon was a powerful moment of redemption. Those powerful moments of healing continue to happen when I am on the road running free. While we have to rely on virtual races this year, through technology we are able to experience the thrill of connection and the tapestry of friendship that is woven together through running. We inspire each other while experiencing physical and psychological transformation overcoming the incredible challenges of our times.



You have until August 9th to register and Run with Billy. Follow this link to learn more and register.

Be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com to be inspired by my journey from having been told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond.

My books are available on Amazon.

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
Mary

When Source is the Source

If you pay attention to the news these days, there is a lot to fear and so much uncertainty. After contracting paralytic polio at the age of 5 followed by years of enduring abuse at the hands of family members and after the diagnosis of Post Polio Syndrome at the age of 53, I connected to Source to guide me through. I continue to remind myself to go above and beyond anything happening in physical reality and focus on gratitude, love, joy, peace, hope, healing and possibilities.

One of the ways I discovered of connecting to Source and tapping into healing, hope and possibilities is through the power of my pen; my divining rod for healing. Shortly after the diagnosis of Post Polio Syndrome, poetry flowed out of me. I healed a tumultuous past through forgiveness and created a future very different from the one the doctors predicted for me.

In mid-March I opened my heart to the Divine and started writing poetry again. Rather than seeking news of the physical reality as portrayed by the media, I sought out seeing Source all around me.

Source from the soon to be released Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life Volume 2

Whenever doubts prevail
look to the sky
sunrise or sunset
in the clouds angels smile
a canvas to send Divine messages.

Sorcerer of all
weaving a tapestry of magic, mystery and wonder
a wave of peace washes over
with broad brush strokes
signs from Master Artist.

My heart overflows
gratitude and blessings
withdraw from chaos or messages of fear
Source pours through every cell
when Source is the Source all things are possible!

On our early Monday morning run, we captured these scenes and signs from Source:


We have been dining outside in our yard and watching the sunsets. I've been captivated by what I have captured:


There have been angels, faces and incredible displays of light.

Given the high heat and humidity, we got up at 6:15am on Wednesday to head out on our run. After meditation, we were treated to these spectacular scenes that we paused to capture:


While contracting paralytic polio and enduring years of abuse and then receiving the diagnosis of Post Polio Syndrome, were the greatest challenges in my life, they also presented me with the greatest gift. I found my way to Source and keep coming home to Source through my running, my meditation and my poetry. For when Source is the Source, all is healed, and all things are possible despite appearances to the contrary!

Be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com to be inspired by my journey of overcoming adversity and healing my life mind, body and soul through the power of the mind/body connection and connection to Source.

My books are available on Amazon.

From my heart to yours
In health and well being
Mary

No way! Way!

Throughout my 13 year healing odyssey from the effects of paralytic polio and trauma, people (and myself) have often said "No way!" and the Universe and I respond "Way!"

Because of my own journey of transformation, I always held faith that one way or another, our daughter Ruth Anne (see blog post The Missing Piece of the Puzzle) would find her healing path. We had no idea of what that path would look like or when it would happen but we visualized her as healthy and whole, and being able to have a relationship with her.

There were moments when it was very challenging to sustain faith and vision for a future very different from the frequent crises we experienced with Ruth Anne. If you would have told me a year ago that I would be out running with her on a regular basis and that she would be pacing me on the roads as I pace her in her life as she continues to heal and recover, I would have said no way. Yet deep down inside I knew there was a way that was yet to be revealed to us.

Yesterday Ruth Anne and I went on our Wednesday morning run together. It was cooler than it had been in awhile and we decided it would be a good day for her to pace me.



While enjoying the scenes of nature and working on my pace, we talked about politics, family, memories, continued to debrief about these past 3 years of her journey, my journey and the excitement of waiting to hear on her acceptance into U Mass Boston Graduate School of Urban Planning and Community Development. Ever since she received her Bachelors Degree she has wanted to pursue a Master's Degree. The professors she reconnected with during the process of applying to UMass were over the moon excited that she is pursuing her Masters Degree and affirmed her achievements as a student in their classes. What powerful medicine to heal the wounds of the past several years where she had been given every psychiatric diagnosis in the book. One of her "therapists" even told her that she was on the progressive course of a schizophrenic!

Fortunately the psychiatrist she works with knew that she did not fit into any specific diagnostic category and wanted to alleviate the pain and suffering caused by the symptoms. He was greatly relieved when we put the pieces of the puzzle together and worked with us to get a medication regimen that would support her healing!

When you see Ruth Anne and me with our vibrant radiant smiles, you would have no idea of what we have endured to arrive at this moment in our lives. You would probably say..."No way! That's just not possible!" and we would say, "Oh yes Way! it's all so possible!"

To learn more about my healing journey from having been told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond, be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books to uplift and inspire you with powerful messages of healing, hope and possibilities are available on Amazon



From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
Mary