A Stubborn Heart

I have always had a stubborn heart and refused to give up despite the seemingly impossible challenges set before me. That stubborn heart often resulted in more abuse from family members but I always stood my ground. Despite being physically weakened by paralytic polio that I contracted at the age of 5 in one of the last polio epidemics in the US, my heart and spirit were strong.Jacqueline Hansen had this to say about my courage in the Foreword to "Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance"
In fact, another Eleanor Roosevelt quotation reminds me of Mary: “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” ...

Try to imagine what it must have been like to be diagnosed with paralytic polio as a child. Try to imagine suffering child abuse at the hands of those very family members who are charged with your upbringing. Try to imagine them together. It’s unbearable to think about. Then imagine surviving the unthinkable, and in adulthood being diagnosed with Post-Polio Syndrome. This is a story that needs to be told. This is a story of challenge, of resiliency, and a story of heart, tremendous heart.

I am fond of using the word “heart.” When coaching young athletes, which I have done my entire adult life, I often tell them to “run with heart.” As I explain to them, I can coach them on skills, on running form, on race strategy, on everything to do with their running, except I cannot create “heart.” This is something that only they can produce from within. I go on to say that “you have to want this (running or racing) more than I do – more than I want it for you.” “Always run with heart.” I am here to tell you that Mary McManus always runs with all her heart.

Just for a moment, let’s ponder the word “heart.” The Latin word for heart is “cor.” Cor is also the root of the word “courage.” I would attribute both heart and courage to Mary. Even Mary herself has said that “It takes incredible courage to heal trauma . . . healing both paralytic polio and trauma.” Author Parker Palmer wrote that “The heart is where we integrate what we know in our mind with what we know in our bones, the place where our knowledge can become more fully human. When all that we understand of self and world comes together in the center place called the heart, we are more likely to find the courage to act humanely on what we know.”

My life has been filled with magic and synchronicity. I was blessed to meet running greats like Jacqueline, Bill Rodgers and Frank Shorter who embraced me and my journey as a survivor of paralytic polio and trauma to going the distance to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond.



I have been blessed by earth angels who have come into my life just when I needed them helping me to create more magic and miracles of healing.

Were there times when I wanted to give up? Absolutely! During the ten years before the diagnosis of Post Polio Syndrome was made, I became increasingly depressed feeling forlorn and lost. I was at the top of my game as a VA social worker but physically, emotionally and spiritually, I was withering away. It was the dark night of my soul. But somehow, some way I kept soldiering on knowing deep within me that I could not and would not give up. I'd survived paralytic polio at age 5 and endured years of violence at the hands of family members. All the years of giving to others and not taking time to take care of me finally caught up with me.

But ... (excerpted from "Running the Race" and "Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility"):

Using wheelchair to travel, set limits on what I could do,
Resulted in joy to realize I could live life anew.
Celebrated my body- creaks, groans and need for a brace
While in my mind I focused on winning a 10K race.
Sought out paths for healing and my spirit flew free
For the first time in life, I could truly be me.
The chains are gone and possibilities abound
I'm a tree with my roots planted firmly in ground.
I'm now off the sidelines, no need to sit and whine
So much gratitude fills my heart and love and beauty shine.
After all these years I can join the loving human race
I exceed all expectations and now I set the pace.

I sobbed to write those words. I had never spoken about polio or the abuse I endured. I became curious. Why am I writing about winning a 10K race?

May you remember that even when you feel like giving up, keep on keeping on because magic happens when you don't give up. The Universe falls in love with a stubborn heart.

To learn more about my journey as a survivor of paralytic polio and trauma to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond, be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books are available on Amazon.

To your health and wellness
From my heart to yours
Mary