Thirteen Years Later: Sail Away From Safe Harbor

May 25, 2007 -- I began my tenure on December 5, 1988. I was hired as the Visual Impairment Services Team Coordinator. I received a Certificate of Appreciation from the Blinded Veterans Association after I was reassigned to give my job to a member of the all male management team despite my outstanding performance in that role. I contemplated leaving the VA but I knew in my heart I belonged serving those who served until it was time for me to heal my life from the effects of paralytic polio and trauma. It was a beautiful summer's day kicking off Memorial Day Weekend in Boston. Instead of heading into Boston as I had done for the past almost 20 years, I drove to the Jamaica Plain VA Campus. I parked in a handicapped space grabbing my cane, wearing my toe up leg brace as I carried a piece of paper that each person had to initial to ensure a proper exit from the VA. I saw many familiar faces as I walked the halls for the last time as an employee. There were hugs, tears and joy that I was going to take care of myself.

After the final stop at personnel, I turned in my ID badge, took a deep breath, and headed out into the sunshine. I sat in my yard clutching my manuscript for "New World Greeting Cards: Inspirational Poetry and Musings for a New World" and editing it. I was preparing it for publication with PublishAmerica. I was in awe of the synchronicity that was happening in my life as I learned about the world of getting a book published and connecting with people who were inspired by my journey.

Many thought I was crazy to leave the security of my career and salary to follow my bliss as a poet author and and to heal my life. Two quotes that stayed with me during those initial days and weeks of retirement were:


and



I was able to transform and transcend my past during these past 13 years.

I have had adventures through the sport of running and made friends that I probably would not have met had I not found the courage to take that leap of faith.

I carry many fond memories of my veterans and their families in my heart and am blessed to be in contact with some of them through social media. I've reconnected with some of my colleagues who continue to serve those who serve and those who have retired after me.

Thirteen years ago I found the courage and strength to sail away from safe harbor with the unconditional love and support from my family.

I have been blessed to explore different life after the VA iterations, dream about running the Boston Marathon and crossing the finish line on April 20, 2009 and discover who I am and who I was always meant to be. I've been blessed to share my journey in books, magazines, in radio interviews and as a motivational speaker. I've been able to touch, bless and help people heal their lives in new ways after leaving my social work career.



Sail on and dream on dear friends!

Take a risk and find yourself land in the middle of the most wondrous adventures.

Be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books are available on Amazon to uplift and inspire you.

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
Mary

Flashback Friday: Meeting Two Running Greats

Although I had written the poem, "Running the Race" as I sat in a toe up leg brace using a cane and at times a wheelchair for mobility, my thoughts on May 22, 2007 were about taking a leap of faith from my award winning career as a VA social worker just 3 years shy of when I would be eligible for retirement. I imagined being a bestselling author and sharing my journey from social worker to author/poet on Oprah to inspire others to follow their bliss and not wait for a crisis to happen in their lives.



I watched the Boston Marathon living not far from the race course many many times and knew about Bill Rodgers. I came to Boston in 1971 to attend Boston University and I never returned to Westchester, New York that was fraught with traumatic memories from abuse from family members and paralytic polio. I was intrigued by the sport. I remembered getting sunburned one unseasonably warm April day as we cheered on the runners at the top of Heartbreak Hill.

I had reconstructive leg surgery one April and people at the VA teased me asking if I were going to run the Boston Marathon. I quipped back, "Not this year."

Be careful what you wish for....

Less than two years after that leap of faith, I found myself sitting in a ballroom at the Hyannis Resort and Conference Center listening to Frank Shorter and Bill Rodgers...two running greats!



I thought that the poster they signed for me was long gone. With all the decluttering we've been doing, it must have fallen out of a top shelf in our linen closet. The other day it seemed to "magically appear" on the closet floor:


From "The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953":
We signed up for the pre-race Pasta Dinner where I introduced myself to Race Director, Paul Collyer. I emailed him before we registered for the race to make sure it was an all paces race. He assured me and then reassured me that I would be fine as long as I finished before the last marathoner crossed the finish line. The marathon consisted of two loops and he used the same finish line for both races. He was happy to meet me and wished me well on my race.

The ballroom with dozens and dozens of round tables covered with white tablecloths set up for 20 people at each table was filled. The sound of chatting runners matched the sound of forks clinking against china. We did not know a soul in the room. We chose one of the few tables where there were vacant seats. We had a delightful conversation with three siblings who had a close loving family. As we served ourselves pasta, salad and Italian bread, I felt the butterflies flutter again in my stomach. I was about to embark on my first 13.1 mile road race. That’s half a marathon! I ate mindfully taking in every moment of the pre-race atmosphere. The conversation quelled as Paulie stood at the podium getting ready to introduce running greats Bill Rodgers and Frank Shorter. I quickly learned there is no separation between everyday runners and running greats. I was enthralled with their running stories and tips for our races. They quipped with each other in tongue in cheek trash talk banter. After their talk we were invited to meet them. We had photo ops, a Boston Marathon poster signed by both Frank and Bill and I received words of encouragement as I prepared to run my first half marathon race on the road to Boston.

As I drifted off to sleep, I reflected on all of my blessings and was in awe of this new community called “runners.”

It became overcast at gun time but the temperature was moderate as we crossed the starting line. We were in the 14 minute/mile pace corral just in front of the walkers. We took off at a fast pace - a 13 minute/mile pace. I told myself to release all feelings of lack and limitation and go with the flow. This was a training run so I needed to push my pace while I also monitored my heart rate. By mile 10, I abandoned my fueling and hydration plan. Sleet pelted my face and my only goal was to cross that finish line.

The post-race reception included bagels, peanut butter, bananas, hot soup from the 99 Restaurant, orange slices and water. I was shivering when I came into the ballroom. Among the thousands of runners streaming into the ballroom, Frank Shorter spotted me.

He put both of his hands on my forearms, looked at me straight in the eye and said, “I have no doubt you are going to finish Boston!”

I told him I wasn’t feeling so well.

“Get hot soup and hydrate,” he said while he congratulated me on finishing the race in tough conditions and signed my bib.

Although I wasn’t feeling well, and should have gone upstairs to take a hot shower, there was a reporter interviewing runners. I told him my story and I was in the next day’s Cape Cod Times:

Mary McManus, 55, of Brookline completed her first half marathon after making a remarkable recovery from a life-long battle against post-polio syndrome.

She spent time at the Spaulding Rehabilitation Hospital and began running just last February. She competed in her first race in June 2008, finishing a 5K.

“It’s like having a new lease on life,” said McManus, who ran yesterday’s half marathon with husband Tom. “I was limping my way through life, but then decided to do something about it.”

It was a phenomenal weekend; the first of many weekends that would come to be known as Camp Hyannis. I earned my first of many medals for finishing a race but the greatest prize was the friendships forged at the pre-race pasta dinner.

With just 8 weeks to go, I began to anticipate toeing the starting line of the 113th Boston Marathon.

We returned to Camp Hyannis for the next 12 years. I'd see Frank on several occasions and Bill and I became friends seeing each other at other races besides Hyannis. We'd meet up with friends we met in previous years and made new friends each year. I inspired runners with my journey and Paul gave me a table at the Expo to sell my books.

This past February I was blessed to be a guest speaker at the pre-race pasta dinner sharing the stage with Bill Rodgers! He embraced me and my journey and even gave me a shout out at the starting line saying how others should be inspired by my journey.



I still smile as I reflect on this grand journey that began on May 25th 2007 when I took a leap of faith to heal my life from the once ravaging effects of paralytic polio and trauma.

Somewhere, deep inside of me, I knew I had a date with destiny:

A Date With Destiny from "Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life"

Don’t wait til you die to let your soul fly free
please listen and hear what happened to me.
My body was broken every imaginable place
yet to the world always a smile on my face.
My soul trapped inside feeling it was broken too
God brought me out of darkness my light I shine on you.
She showed me the way through people I met
it took awhile a message hard to get.

The kingdom of heaven is right inside me
take the leap of faith fulfill destiny.
While I did my soul work and let my soul fly free
my body transformed changes did I see.
My head now aligned the tremor no more
my body aligned such strength in my core.
When once head detached from my heart and my soul
they all work together amazingly whole.
The rules that I live by are my rules alone
I found strength and courage the past now has flown.

I followed my heart to create myself anew
to feel simply Divine despite all I’ve lived through.
Take the leap of faith into grace I can fall
but I’m floating on air answering God’s call
Don’t wait til you die to let your soul fly free
there’s no reason to live a life in misery.
Follow your passions and I will tell you this
the body falls away healed when you follow your bliss.

I've been incredibly blessed with the miracle of healing mind, body and soul and the people I've met along the way including two running greats!

To learn more about my quest to heal my life, visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books are available on Amazon.

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
Mary

Coming Home

Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility is the title of the first book in my Trilogy of Transformation sharing my journey from the diagnosis of Post Polio Syndrome, a progressive neuromuscular disease to the finish line of the Boston Marathon and beyond. Here are copies of my book in the crate as I anticipated the book Launch Party on May 23, 2014:





On May 25, 2007, I took a leap of faith leaving my award winning career as a VA social worker where I received accolades as Social Worker of the Year, Employee of the Month and Certificates of Appreciation from the Blinded Veterans Association and Former POW's:


I knew I needed to heal my life from the ravages of paralytic polio and enduring years of abuse at the hands of family members. I knew that I did not practice good self care and was not even aware of how my past was trapped in my body and I became trapped in my life.

But in the cold, dark days of February 2007, I got still and asked for Divine Guidance. The answer to my query for guidance came in the form of a poem and then many many poems in which I imagined a future very different from the one doctors predicted for me and my pen, my divining rod for healing opened the portal to healing my past.

I found my way home through the sport of running. Although I had never run a day in my life, the first poem I wrote was "Running the Race." That poem foreshadowed my 2009 Boston Marathon and led me to a sport that transformed my life mind, body and soul!



A Neighborhood Run

Early on a weekend morning
lacing up
heading out
heart open
feeling free
runners pass me left and right
but no matter
I run my own race
keep my own pace
peaceful and content
joyful
celebrating health
feeling well and whole
holy integrated
in my sacred earthly home
remembering a time not so long ago
of estrangement from myself
isolated and apart
unworthy and wretched
oh the stories we tell ourselves
but no more
on this late summer day
my neighborhood
coming home in my body
I come home to my life.

Just as Dorothy experienced being transported to a world unlike any she had known, "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore," we have all been transported to a world of stay at home orders, masks, sanitation and social distancing requirements. I am so grateful that I took that leap of faith 13 years ago as it holds me in good stead for navigating the uncharted waters of our times. While there were times of anxiety and angst, doubts and fears, faith and love and a belief in myself prevailed. I discovered the power within me to transform my life only the power was in my running shoes instead of ruby red slippers.



May you dear readers discover the power you have within you and may you discover the joy in coming home to your life!

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
Mary

Be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books are available on Amazon

Magical Monday Morning Miles

May 19, 2007...My butterflies were out in full force as I had only a few days left of my award winning career as a VA social worker. Six weeks prior I gave my notice that I was leaving my career to follow my newfound passion as a poet and writer and heal my life from the effects of childhood paralytic polio and trauma. I was saying goodbye to my veterans, their families and my colleagues. I had a retirement party on May 17th organized by my Team at the Causeway Street Outpatient Clinic:


Invitations were sent across the campuses and people dropped in to wish me well. The Social Work staff gave me a farewell luncheon at Bertucci's in West Roxbury and showered me with meaningful gifts that I still cherish today.

I sat wearing my toe up leg brace having my cane near by:


and had a pad of yellow lined paper to write down poems that were flowing out of me. Although the first poem I wrote was called, "Running the Race" I would not know the magic that was in running shoes until April of 2008.

May 18, 2020 ... It was a grey drizzly yet warm morning and as I do every Monday morning, I lace up my running shoes to go out for a 5K run. These runs are even more special and sacred during the pandemic. While this time of having a stay at home order has brought much heartache and angst, it has also been a time of overwhelming gratitude and appreciation for the "little things" in life especially being out in nature when no one is around free to run.

We were treated to serenity and solitude and the joy of Mama Goose teaching the baby geese how to feed while the Papa Goose stood guard ready to defend his family at a moment's notice:


I did my fastest time since March 7th which was right around the time the pandemic with a shut down was looming on the horizon.

I was sweaty and felt that rush of endorphins that one gets after a great run.

There IS magic in those running shoes and magic to be experienced all around while on a run.

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness,
Mary

Be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

My books are available on Amazon

Run for Your Life

Thirteen years ago I was at 10 days and counting until I left my award winning career as a VA social worker to "heal my life." The day had been circled in red on my calendar for 6 weeks in advance of May 25th, 2007. It was almost go time...


I felt as though the Universe was giving me a shove out of the nest of safety of having a full time job with a very good salary into the unknown. It was both exhilarating and terrifying at the same time!

Did I have any idea that just a little less than a year later I would be featured on the cover of "Healthy Brookline" in the Brookline Tab giving an interview about my journey on the road to the 2009 Boston Marathon?



Absolutely not although I had written the poem, "Running the Race".

In early May 2008, I sat with Neal Simpson in a coffee shop in Brookline sharing my journey with him:

Fifty years after polio, a Brookline woman is fighting back
By Neal Simpson/staff writer

Brookline - Since she was a little girl, Mary McManus had rarely moved faster than a walk.

But last month, the former polio patient bought her first pair of running shoes. And now she’s training for a marathon.

Paralyzed by polio at the age of 5, the Brookline mother of two now spends every day fighting back against the crippling effects of the disease that still threatens to rob her of her strength and mobility 50 years later. She said she won’t stop until she runs her first marathon.

“I just know with every fiber in my body that we will,” she said. “It’s all happening.”

McManus faces an uphill battle. Though polio itself has been virtually eradicated from the developed world, McManus is one of more than 440,000 Americans who could see a resurgence of symptoms decades later, according to the National Center for Health Statistics.

Scientists believe this resurgence, called post-polio syndrome, is a result of natural aging and stress on the motor neurons that survive an initial polio attack.

Polio survivors learn to depend on these motor neurons as they recover, and can live relatively normal lives before they give out later in life, according to Mary Cole, a senior occupational therapist at the International Center for Polio in Framingham.

“There’s usually a long period of stability,” said Cole. “If not, there’s something else going on.”

Cole teaches post-polio patients how to save their energy, and recommends that many start using the braces and canes they once used as kids. It’s about improving quality of life, she said.

“A lot of people think exercise is what can get you through this, and that’s not the case,” Cole said. “Most of these patients have been overusing these muscles, and we need to find a balance.”

But McManus said she refuses to slow down. She wants to prove that other post-polio patients don’t have to, either.

“I’m here to let them know that that might be true for some people, it doesn’t have to that way,” she said.

‘Everything just gave out’

It was 1958, and McManus was a kindergartner in gym class. She remembers exactly how it happened.

“I was running around, having a great time, and I just dropped,” she remembered. “Everything just gave out.”

Polio left McManus paralyzed on her left side. She was walking again within a couple of months, but her limp would never leave her and she often tired easily.

Unable to play with her classmates, the young McManus turned to academics.

“I became a straight-A student, and I was valedictorian,” she said. “I never thought much about my body. It was an enemy — I hated it.”

All through her childhood, her college years and her career as a veterans’ social worker, McManus suffered from chronic fatigue, a burning sensation in her muscles and a slight limp. But in 1996, things started to get much worse, as McManus often felt short of breath and began having trouble swallowing.

But McManus’ doctors, unfamiliar with post-polio syndrome, blamed the symptoms on menopause, coupled with depression prompted by her twin children’s departure for college.

So McManus soldiered on for another decade as her symptoms became even worse. By the time she got help in 2006, she could barely get out of bed in the morning and had trouble climbing the stairs in her house. Tremors shook her body and her limp became more severe.

“I was beside myself,” she said. “In my private moments, I just wanted to give up.”

In her darkest hour, McManus turned to prayer and poetry to sustain her. As her collection of poems grew, she began compiling it into a book, which she has published under the title “New World Greetings.”

McManus eventually checked into Spaulding Rehabilitation Hospital in Boston, where she was diagnosed with post-polio syndrome after doctors ruled out all other causes. The first thing the doctors told herwas to quit her high-stress job and focus on herself.

It was exactly what she needed, McManus said.

“I needed to hear that I needed to stop everything and conserve my energy,” she said.

McManus quit her job of 18 years in May 2007, and immediately began feeling better. With the stress of life as a social worker gone, McManus felt her body began rebuilding lost muscle.

Starting that summer, doctors at Spaulding treated McManus for a pinched nerve and helped her regain her upper-body strength. She began a regimen of cardiovascular exercise and learned to conserve her energy.

“They got me to the point where I felt a little stronger,” she said. “My pain went almost to nothing.”

More importantly, McManus said, the exercises gave her a sense of control over her body and the confidence to do something about her disease.

‘Let’s see what this body can do’

When she was discharged from Spaulding in October, McManus called up a personal trainer she’d heard of named Janine Hightower.

“Basically, we said, ‘Let’s see what this body can do.’”

At the time, McManus was struggling to climb a 12-inch step in her home. When the two began their exercises, McManus set a low standard for success: All she wanted, she said, was the ability to get off her toilet without help.

Hightower began her on a gentle exercise routine, gradually advancing her from strength training to short jogs.

“When she was first learned she had post-polio syndrome, everyone was telling her to go easy on her body to rest and sit down,” Hightower said. “I sort of took the opposite approach. I told her to challenge her body.”

McManus took the message to heart. When she began reaching the goals they had set earlier this year, Hightower asked McManus what she wanted to do next.

Run a marathon, she responded.

What do you think? Add your comment to article at www.wickedlocal.com/brookline.
Neal Simpson can be reached at nsimpson@cnc.com.

While a few of the facts were incorrect; I was never an inpatient at Spaulding and I was discharged from outpatient care that began in January in May of 2007, Neal eloquently captured the essence of where I was in my journey. The Tab also assigned a photographer for the article.

People did leave comments on the article letting me know how much I inspired them with my journey.

One of the most stunning aspects of my experience is how the physiatrist and therapists at the Post Polio Clinic set themselves up as experts letting me know with great authority that I was destined for a course of rapid decline as I aged. I was blessed to meet a physical therapist at another Spaulding site who did not subscribe to the "if you use it you will lose it" philosophy and then to meet Janine who helped me to go the distance in my quest to heal my life from the once ravaging effects of paralytic polio and enduring years of abuse at the hands of family members.co

I discovered the sport of running that transformed my life and continues to be my source of joy, health and well being and therapy for my mind, body and soul.

I knew with a deep knowing that it was time to run for my life ignoring the warnings of the medical community and tuning in to the Voice within to guide me.

From my heart to yours
To your health and wellness
In love and gratitude
Mary

Be sure to visit my website to learn more about my journey from being told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair to the finish line of the Boston Marathon and beyond.

My books are available on Amazon

Transformation Tuesday: Reflections on My Leap of Faith

May 12, 2007: I sat in a nearly bare office at 251 Causeway Street in Boston. I was winding down my nearly 20 year career as a dedicated social worker at the VA Outpatient Clinic. I was counting down the days until May 25th, the day I would take a leap of faith to heal my life.

I was saying goodbye to veterans and their families and my colleagues and co-workers while preparing myself for a new way of life. I had worked since I was 14 years old and had no idea what it would be like to not have a job to report to. I did, however, have my work cut out for me. In December of 2006 I was diagnosed with Post Polio Syndrome deemed by Western Medicine as a progressive neuromuscular disease. I was using a toe up leg brace, cane and at times a wheelchair for mobility:


I knew I could no longer keep up the rigors of a full time job that was physically and emotionally demanding yet it was one that brought me incredible joy and satisfaction until I suffered caregiver burnout.

I found new joy and passion in writing poetry. I called my pen my divining rod for healing as it opened the portal to a whole new world of healing, hope and possibility.

My colleagues thought that I should have reconsidered my decision to take a leap of faith without a "safety net." Who could blame them? I was leaving a well paying job with health insurance with no specific plans except to follow my newfound bliss as a writer and poet and heal my life.

I knew I was not destined to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair or have all the other things happen to my body that the doctors predicted for me. I was blessed to be working with an earth angel of a physical therapist, Allison Lamarre-Poole (now in private practice in Maine). She led me out of my world as a survivor of paralytic polio and trauma to a whole new world of a mind/body connection and introducing me to the world of working out and being a full participant in my own life. She supported my passion for poetry and told me in word and actions that I was in fact NOT destined to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair.

We worked together three times a week using Pilates, isometrics, weight training and cardiovascular exercise to begin to bring my body out of its withered state.

When I wasn't seeing patients, I was getting still and taking time to imagine my future as a poet and entrepreneur as the owner of "New World Greeting Cards" original poetry for every occasion. I literally felt no pain when I wrote poetry and it flowed out of me like water from a faucet. It was as though a spigot had been turned on in my heart and soul.

As I look back on the days leading up to my retirement, I realize how people thought I was crazy to take that leap of faith. One couldn't earn a living as an author and certainly not as a poet yet I fancied myself as a NY Times Bestselling Author and being on Oprah.

I clearly remember thinking to myself one morning after meditation, "I know I have money. I am abundant." And then it came to me..."I have my retirement account. I am going to withdraw it and use it for seed money."

Another idea that caused panic for my co-workers and colleagues who were worried that I may have been experiencing some kind of a breakdown but for me I was following my intuition and Divine Guidance. A year later the market crashed and I would have lost a lot of that retirement account that was available to me as I embarked on writing a new chapter in my life. I was able to use that money for travel and to get us through those initial months without my salary. Throughout these past 13 years, we have focused on abundance even when there were times when we were experiencing financial strain. But without my health and well being, what good would that salary have been to me and to our family.

Although I wasn't on Oprah, I have had the opportunity to inspire many many people with my journey and my message of what's possible despite all appearances to the contrary. I took on the 2009 Boston Marathon with the help of an angelic personal trainer, Janine Hightower who I was blessed to meet in October of 2007.

What a thrill it was this past February to share the podium with Bill Rodgers and have him honor me as we spoke at the Hyannis Marathon Weekend Pre-Race Pasta Dinner:


I have had many many adventures as runnergirl 1953 on the roads and in my life and I discovered many empowering and inspiring quotes along this journey:



and my favorite from Helen Keller:


So while this pandemic has created a lot of anxiety and uncertainty, it is also an amazing time for possibilities to emerge that despite all appearances to the contrary may seem impossible.

Always hold onto hope and my hope is that my journey inspires you to take that leap of faith and create your life filled with abundance, health and well being.

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
With love and peace
Mary

Be sure to visit my website to learn more about my inspirational journey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the Boston Marathon and beyond!

My books are available on Amazon.

The Celebration of Success

Thirteen years ago at this time, I was planning to leave my award winning career as a VA social worker to "heal my life." In December of 2006, I was diagnosed with a progressive neuromuscular disease, Post Polio Syndrom and told to prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair. After getting still and asking for Divine Guidance, I realized a path for healing was opening before me and I needed to take that leap of faith in order to follow that path.

I was led to the sport of running of all things although I had never run a day in my life! One of my defining moments early on in my quest for the Unicorn also known as declaring in February of 2008 that I was going to run the 2009 Boston Marathon happened during the Marathon Sports 5 Miler Road Race:


From "Going the Distance: The Power of Endurance":

After my first road race, The Corrib Pub Run 5K, we signed up for the Marathon Sports 5 Miler in July of 2008. It was hot. It was an evening race. I had just begun my running career.

Our first 5 mile race was the Marathon Sports 5 miler. It was a hot, steamy evening in July. We got lost on the way to the race. Tempers were running as hot as the thermometer because I was so anxious about running my first five mile race. My energy tended to wane by the evening as I was continuing to deal with the late effects of polio. We finally arrived and walked around trying to enjoy the pre-race festivities. As everyone took their place at the start, I could see that this was a serious, competitive running crowd; quite a contrast to my first race ever, the Corrib Pub Run 5K in June.

Runners went out fast and Tom and I were in the back of the pack with a few other people. Even they took off. I experienced my first (of many) marathon training meltdowns. I cried as I shared with Tom all the memories of having kids take off and leave me behind that were bubbling to the surface. I was sweating and tired and hot. I couldn’t tell where my tears ended and sweat began. I told Tom I had no business training for the Boston Marathon. He was amazing and he told me that I couldn’t quit. We would make it through this race and we would make it through every training run. He believed in me when I did not believe in myself. I did know, however, that if I didn’t finish that race, I would never make it to the starting line of the Boston Marathon. Alison, Brookline Marathon Sports store manager who was named our mother hen during Boston Marathon training, gave me water and a high five out on the course. She was worried about me in the heat and wanted to make sure I was okay.

Despite finishing dead last, members of the Marathon Sports family who knew the story of Team McManus, had air horns and a truck on the field honking and blowing and cheering us on to the finish. I knew training for Boston was not going to be easy, but I knew I had what it was going to take to make it happen.

When we crossed the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon:


all that mattered was the success of that moment!

The grueling miles we put into training. The pain I experienced as a survivor of paralytic polio training for my first marathon with no prior running experience seemed to melt away when I stepped on the finish line on Boylston Street.

Thirteen years after leaving my career, I experience success as a blogger, author, poet, and motivational speaker. Those times of financial insecurity, uncertainty about my whether or not I had declared too bold a goal given my diagnosis and whether or not I really had the power to transform my life and transcend my past are all behind me as success overshadows the challenges of these past 13 years. In the midst of this pandemic. I do have my moments of anxiety and worry but success breeds success and confidence in experiencing success whatever the challenge may be.

Success is measured in different ways for different people so be kind to yourself in terms of how you frame your success. Be sure to:


As someone who has endured many many challenges in life beginning with contracting polio at age 5 and enduring years of abuse at the hands of family members, I can unequivocally bear witness to the truth that celebrating success overshadows the hardships that were endured along the way.

To celebrating your success!

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
With love and peace
Mary

Be sure to visit my website to learn more about my inspirational journey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the Boston Marathon and beyond!

My books are available on Amazon.

A Leap of Faith

I knew it was time to leave my award winning career as a VA social worker after receiving the diagnosis of Post-Polio Syndrome in December of 2006. I was terrified to set "the date" for when I would take a leap of faith and move into a new chapter of my life. Shortly after the diagnosis of what doctors said would be a progressive neuromuscular disease and that I should prepare to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair, I discovered the gift of poetry in my soul. My pen became my divining rod for healing and I knew there would be life after the VA but how could I possibly leave behind an almost six figure salary with great benefits just 3 years shy of when I was eligible for retirement? While I had wondrous imaginings about becoming a New York Times Bestselling author and being on Oprah with my journey of transformation, I was well aware that we had a mortgage and bills to pay.

I originally set the date for October of 2007 but in April, I went for a routine mammogram.

From 'Coming Home: A Memoir of Healing, Hope and Possibility':
In April I went for a routine mammogram. I spoke to the Universe, “I know that I cannot have an abnormal mammogram right now because I have enough on my plate.” I was all too aware of my risk for breast cancer given that my mother, her mother and my father’s sister all had breast cancer. My father’s sister died from breast cancer. “This is not going to happen to me,” I vowed.

The red light was blinking on my office phone indicating I had a voicemail message.

“Hello this message is for Mary McManus. It’s the Breast Center at Mass. General Hospital. Please call us at your earliest convenience.”

“Oh no – this isn’t happening, “ I thought to myself.

I felt the all too familiar clutch in my stomach and my sympathetic nervous system went into high gear. As a trauma survivor, I would vacillate between states of exhaustion and states of high alert. Years later I would learn from Peter A. Levine in his book, “In An Unspoken Voice: How the Body Releases Trauma and Restores Goodness” that I was unable to regulate going from my sympathetic nervous system responsible for fight/flight and the parasympathetic nervous system which helps the body to return to a state of equanimity and calm.

With hands trembling, I dialed Mass. General. Even though Allison had taught me about breathing and the importance of taking deep breaths, my breaths were shallow. My hands sweaty. I had no control over what was happening to me.

“Hi. This is Mary McManus I received a call from your office.”
“One moment please – I’ll transfer you.”

“Hello is this Mrs. McManus?” a polite voice on the other end of the line asked me.

“Um yes well it seems that there is an abnormality on your mammogram. It looks like you have a mass of some kind. We need you to come in next week for a repeat mammogram.”

Okay Universe. What are you trying to tell me here? I examined my left breast and sure enough, I could feel a mass. I remembered the power of visualization from Bernie Siegel’s work and I figured I had nothing to lose and everything to gain by harnessing the power of visualization. I was on a mission – to heal whatever was going on in my left breast.

A week later I received the all clear. The mass disappeared. My 19 year old daughter said, "Okay mom. How much notice do you have to give at the VA? or are you going to wait for something else to happen?"

She was right! We circled May 25th on the calendar and the next day I gave my notice to my Nurse Manager, my Social Work Supervisor and the Chief of Social Work. At first my Nurse Manager was extremely supportive of me but the next day she told me that I couldn't possibly be serious about just leaving my career behind. She suggested that I work part time and really take time to think over my decision. I had already begun to clean out of my office and she was shocked to see the steps I had already taken to leave. She did not know that I was keeping a journal in which I imagined my life after the VA, that I had started "New World Greeting Cards", original poetry for every occasion and that I was getting ready to self publish my book of poetry.

"What if your husband gets laid off from his new job at Children's? You know how finicky the technology industry has been of late. And what about health insurance?"

I calmly told her my husband would carry the health insurance and there was a law recently passed that children could be covered until the age of 22 if they were in school.

Okay so maybe I did not calmly tell her these things. I was terrified but that's why it's called a leap of faith!

I withdrew my entire retirement account and took the penalty for early withdrawal. It was my seed money for my new venture and an investment in my future. As I told people, I was leaving the VA to heal my life only at the time I had no idea what that meant.

I was discharged from Outpatient Therapy at Spaulding Rehab the day before I was leaving the VA after almost 20 years of service. My physical therapist was leaving Spaulding to become a traveling PT. We hugged and we cried after our almost 6 month journey together of my reclaiming my life from the effects of childhood paralytic polio and trauma.

In October I hired a personal trainer to see if I could get a little stronger and build on the program from my outpatient therapist.

I could not even pass the initial assessment!

By February I had met my initial health and fitness goals and then...
From 'The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953':

Janine feverishly wrote down my goals, and we worked out a plan. She gathered up her belongings and had her hand on the door knob.

“Wait. I have one more goal.”

Janine stopped and turned around.

“I want to run the Boston Marathon for Spaulding Rehab Hospital. I know they have a Race for Rehab team and I want to do it next year.”

Did you ever have one of those moments when words fell out of your mouth after rising up from the depths of your soul without going through any thought process?

Janine was non-plussed. I don’t know what kept her from turning tail and getting as far away from me as she could. She came back into my house, set down her things and without missing a beat said, “Well the first thing you are going to need is a pair of running shoes.”

She laid out a cursory training plan and said that we would begin indoors to build up my cardio endurance. As soon as the weather got a little warmer, we’d go outdoors and I would learn how to run.

What had I just done?

I took ANOTHER leap of faith! I had never run a day in my life. I knew nothing about running a marathon let alone the Boston Marathon but I felt a stirring deep in my soul that running the 2009 Boston Marathon was my destiny...and it was.





From 'Feel the Heal: An Anthology of Poems to Heal Your Life':
What is so striking to me is that a poem I wrote in 2007 is now manifesting in physical reality. I write about the tremors being healed and having a strong core; creating myself anew and playing my game my rules (to quote Boston Marathon Race Director Dave McGillvray's favorite phrase that I only heard last year). At the time, I had not yet been discharged from Spaulding Rehab's outpatient care. I was told that I would need to spend the rest of my life in a wheelchair. I was by all appearances weak, deconditioned, wearing a leg brace, experiencing chronic fatigue and pain. Tremors were very evident at the time and yet, yet I wrote this poem that talks about the body falling away healed as I prepared to leave my award winning career as a VA social worker:

A Date With Destiny

Don’t wait til you die to let your soul fly free
please listen and hear what happened to me.
My body was broken every imaginable place
yet to the world always a smile on my face.
My soul trapped inside feeling it was broken too
God brought me out of darkness my light I shine on you.
She showed me the way through people I met
it took awhile a message hard to get.

The kingdom of heaven is right inside me
take the leap of faith fulfill destiny.
While I did my soul work and let my soul fly free
my body transformed changes did I see.
My head now aligned the tremor no more
my body aligned such strength in my core.
When once head detached from my heart and my soul
they all work together amazingly whole.
The rules that I live by are my rules alone
I found strength and courage the past now has flown.

I followed my heart to create myself anew
to feel simply Divine despite all I’ve lived through.
Take the leap of faith into grace I can fall
but I’m floating on air answering God’s call
Don’t wait til you die to let your soul fly free
there’s no reason to live a life in misery.
Follow your passions and I will tell you this
the body falls away healed when you follow your bliss.

When destiny called to me, I embraced all of my fears and harnessed the power of my faith and my village to leap into a future filled with health, well being, and wonderful adventures.

What is your date with destiny?

From my heart to yours
In health and wellness
Mary

Be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

Be inspired by my interview with Kendra Petrone on the award winning Exceptional Women Show by following this link

To experience an epic race weekend and hear me share my journey from a wheelchair to the finish line of the 2009 Boston Marathon and beyond come to the Hyannis Marathon Weekend February 21-23 2020.

Twelve Years Later: Security is a Superstition

We had a Bermudaful sunrise on May 25, 2019.


Twelve years ago I sat in a lawn chair in a toe up leg brace


after I went through the process of 'clearing out' from the Boston VA Healthcare System where I worked for almost 20 years and had an award winning career as a VA social worker.

I remember it was a beautiful sunny day and I asked myself the question, "What had I just done?"

I walked away from a career that paid handsomely but no longer fueled my heart and soul. I needed to heal my life. I didn't have any plan for what was next. I just knew in every fiber of my being I had to make serious changes in my life or I wasn't going to have a life.

I would ask that question on many occasions during my twelve year healing odyssey.

Yet every time I asked that question, the Universe would answer with "You've taken another risk; another leap of faith." Every time I did I found myself inspiring others stepping deeper and deeper into the passion and purpose for my life after the VA.

As we dressed for our 5K run in Bermuda to celebrate twelve years of healing, the birds sang outside our window at the Royal Palms Hotel as if they were celebrating with us.

We wore our Team Big Heart shirts as Tom is running the Falmouth Road Race to fund raise for the Joseph Middlemiss Big Heart Foundation. It's so much fun to run "Middlemiss Miles" and spread the word about Joseph's amazing 6 years with us and how his legacy of love, joy and kindness lives on.

We set out early so we could get back and enjoy the hotel's complimentary continental breakfast. We filled up our water bottles and headed to Front Street running a part of the Bermuda Half Marathon course. We ran through a charming neighborhood from the Hotel to Front Street:


It was a nostalgic run as Tom and I reminisced about how we came to fall in love with Bermuda. From "The Adventures of Runnergirl 1953":

Have you ever been to Bermuda?" Herb Simmons asked me as I was helping him put together a photo album to write the story of the Sea and Surf Anglers Club of Boston and the Blue Waters Anglers Club of Bermuda.

Herb was the first person of color to be named Chief of Pharmacy at Boston City Hospital when, at the age of 49, he suffered a massive stroke. Initially he was totally blind and then regained some vision. He could see with his eyes but had difficulty processing what he saw as a result of the stroke. I was the Visual Impairment Services Team Coordinator charged with providing social work intervention to the visually impaired veterans at the VA. Herb made it very clear from the beginning he did not want to be a patient. He quickly transitioned from patient to invaluable volunteer. Through the Telefriend Program, Herb kept in touch with other legally blind veterans who were housebound, elderly veterans and veterans considered at risk due to their mental health diagnoses. Together we were blessed to literally save lives. I told Herb we had never been to Bermuda; we hadn't been on a vacation since the twins were born 12 years ago in 1987. He told me we must go to Bermuda for our first after twins vacation. We would take care of the airfare and our stay at the Grotto Bay, a family friendly resort, and he would make sure that his Bermudian friend and fellow angler, Lovintz Cann would be our host.

Lovintz picked us up at the airport and drove us a short distance to the Grotto Bay.

“Enjoy your evening and tomorrow morning at 10:00 am I’ll be here to take you on a tour of the Island and out to lunch. Welcome to Bermuda!”

We ran past the Blue Waters Anglers Club where we spent many happy moments waiting for the boats to come in and being a part of Tournament Weekend as the Sea and Surf Anglers Club of Boston fished against the Blue Waters. The Blue Waters Anglers Club almost always won on their home "surf".



The scenery on our run was spectacular:


After a delicious breakfast, we spent the day by the pool relaxing, reading and soaking up the sunshine.

Twelve years later we showered and dressed for a celebratory dinner at Flanagan's.

We had a table reserved on their patio and a server who truly enjoyed her work.


We had a hummus plate and fish chowder for appetizers:


Tom indulged in a Dark 'n Stormy:


When we couldn't decide on what we were going to eat, our server asked us what we were considering and then suggested we get one catch of the day and one Cottage Pie and share. The catch of the day was Wahoo!



We held hands as we walked leisurely back to the hotel; a walk that would have been nearly impossible for me 12 years ago.

While many thought I was crazy to have done what I did, I'm with Helen Keller's belief that security doesn't exist and so I transformed my life into a daring adventure. Twelve years later I am so happy with the choice I made.

From my heart to yours
In Health and Wellness,
Mary

Be sure to visit my website at www.marymcmanus.com

Hear my interview with Kendra Petrone on Magic 106.7's Exceptional Women Show by following this link

My books are available on Amazon and at Paper Fiesta in Natick on Mile 10 of the Boston Marathon route. Proceeds of book sales for May through July are going to Tom McManus's Falmouth Road Race run for the Joseph Middlemiss Big Heart Foundation. You can also make a direct donation by following this link.